Alcohol-Free Living: Tips and Tricks to Help You Quit or Reduce Your Intake

In this episode, we dive deep into alcohol and why you might want to give it up.

Tune in and discover:

• How to handle nights out and the tricky questions that come when you say, “I’m not drinking.”
• The truth behind the industry’s claims about alcohol – and why they’re not as accurate as you think.
• Is giving up alcohol really that hard? It might be easier than you think, depending on a few key factors…
• Why taking a month off alcohol could be the game-changer you need – and how to approach it.
• The 5 simple words that will help you gracefully exit any alcohol-related conversation.
• And much more!

So tune in now, and if you need support then check out, This Naked Mind, and/or, Alcoholics Anonymous.

00:00 - Introduction: Why giving up alcohol is a challenge
02:15 - Barriers to quitting: Social and subconscious patterns
03:40 - Reframing alcohol’s role: Inclusivity and experimentation
05:00 - Physical dependency: Importance of medical supervision
07:30 - Societal norms: How alcohol is everywhere
09:15 - Mindset shift: Sober curiosity and habit-breaking milestones
12:00 - Navigating festive drinking: Practical tips and motivation
16:30 - Dealing with peer pressure: Positive communication strategies
20:00 - Rebuilding connections: Strengthening authentic relationships
25:00 - Final takeaways: Planning and seeking support

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Transcript

Transcript

Nick Poninski: Hello there and welcome back to another episode of Marketing Made Easy for Consultants with me, Nick Poninski.  last week. If you've listened along, you've heard all the major benefits of giving up alcohol. You'll have heard that it is a poison that kills you and it's addictive. That's the headline. And then on the lower focused area is that you'll sleep better, your skin will be better, all that good stuff. So, what we promised was that part Cath would come along again and we would talk about how to actually give up change your relationship with alcohol.

Nick Poninski: because that is quite a difficult bit.

Kath Elliott: 

Nick Poninski: Thank you for joining us again this week, C. Yeah.

Kath Elliott: Thank you for having me.

Kath Elliott: Looking forward to part two of this conversation.

Nick Poninski: I thought it was important to bring this on obviously for me and we were talking last week about how we gave up, So, for me it was so simple I was ready to give up. I picked up a book and I was like, "Okay, It's done. it's not a problem."  Whereas for the vast majority of people out there, that's not going to be the case. They are going to struggle with this, they have a different relationship, different mindset, and maybe they have a different perspective. Not maybe, they'll have a different perspective. yeah. let's talk about some tactics to give up. So, let's split it up.

Nick Poninski: Let's talk about why it's so difficult to give up, from our own perspective, from the pressures of society,…

Kath Elliott: 

Nick Poninski: pressures of other people. And then and I keep saying give up, let's talk about how, strategies, tactics, tips, how to realign our relationship with alcohol. Is that all right?

Kath Elliott: Yeah. Perfect.

Kath Elliott: Perfect. I think it's important to, create sort of inclusivity around relationship with alcohol because any changes that you make to your relationship with alcohol that feel better, it's really important because not everyone is going to want to embrace an free life or quit drinking. and there's a lot of fear around what will I be missing out on?

Kath Elliott: what will I be losing if I choose to knock alcohol out of my life. One of the things I will say is that the most important thing is to be open and curious to new knowledge about alcohol. one of the things that can really hold us back from changing our relationship with alcohol is that over many years we have developed these very firmly entrenched subconscious patterns that are just autopilot. And so a lot of our thoughts and beliefs around drinking and what value it adds to our life are running in the background.

Kath Elliott: 

Kath Elliott: And we have to do work on these thoughts and beliefs to really debunk them, put them on trial because for instance I'll just give an example of one that to have fun when I'm socializing I need alcohol right we a real link to that thought or…

Nick Poninski: That's a thinking. Yeah.

Kath Elliott: belief and I know for me that was a big one because I was very much a social drinker and Of course, if you don't have lived experience of times where you have gone out and had fun without alcohol, why are you going to think that you can? Because you are associating alcohol with fun times, right? So, part of it is stepping into this mindset of I am going to be uncomfortable.

Kath Elliott: I'm going to be doing things that I haven't done before without alcohol, but that when I step in and start to do them, for instance, going to a party without alcohol, I am going to be doing that maybe for the first time in a long time. And that I don't know what that's going to feel like. And it's really about thinking, okay, there will be benefits and there may also be things that feel a bit uncomfortable. but I'm open to what those are. And I remember, when I started to go to parties for the first time, yes, sometimes it was a bit awkward the first 10 minutes or so when everyone else is grabbing a drink. But for me, it was about preparing. what do I say when someone asks me if I'm having a drink? no thanks. I'm having a non-alcoholic drink. I'm driving or, I'm taking a break from alcohol at the moment. I'm feeling really good.

Kath Elliott: and it was also about playing the tape forward as well as to how I felt when I got home and the next day and feeling, strong, healthy, in control, clearheaded, all of those benefits really started to make me feel like, yes, this is how I want to live moving forward.  And I think the other thing is just to be really present and to just stick to a day at a time when you're changing your relationship with alcohol. And some people are physically dependent on alcohol, right?

00:05:00

Kath Elliott: 

Kath Elliott: And so that's a different level of having to manage detoxing of some quite negative symptoms that can come when you physically withdraw from alcohol. And I just want to acknowledge that people in that type of scenario will often need medical supervision to physically detox from alcohol. And so it's really important to seek the advice of medical professional if you are someone who believes that you do have a physical dependency or addiction to alcohol because I know that both probably you or I did not have that.

Kath Elliott: And so we are talking from a different perspective.

Nick Poninski: Yeah. Yeah.

Nick Poninski: For certain it was Yeah. I don't know. I'm not going to say anything really because there's not anything I have any real experience of. So as CF says, she's the professional. If that's the relationship that you have with Alco, then seek out help for let's talk about alcohol from a society perspective. Why is it so give difficult to give up from a society? We'll move on to personal perspective like you were talking about there. I can't have a good time about alcohol and…

Kath Elliott: 

Nick Poninski: whatever else. But let's talk about it from society perspective because alcohol is everywhere, So that's why it's so difficult to give up.

Kath Elliott: Yeah. I mean,…

Kath Elliott: we're both in cultures in the UK and…

Kath Elliott: Australia where excessive drinking is very normalized through not only how we're social Yeah.

Nick Poninski: Yeah, I mean any drinking is normalized,…

Nick Poninski: it's everywhere. Every adult function you go to, it's there. And that's difficult to then rearrange your relationship with alcohol if it's constantly on offer. if I was giving up heroin isn't everywhere. It would be much more easier to give that up.  Whereas alcohol, all you have to do is leave the house and it's everywhere. Everyone

Kath Elliott: Everywhere you go, you turn up to a funeral and afterwards there's alcohol. you turn up to parties, barbecues, sporting events, it's everywhere, right? and so part of,…

Nick Poninski: Yeah. Yes.

Kath Elliott: this changing your relationship with alcohol is challenging what society has fed us, right? which is lies that we need alcohol to really get through, experience our lives. and I think for me, one of the big ones that I had was that, drinking gave me an opportunity to rebel and, be kind of a bit naughty and whatever. I now look at sober life as that's the ultimate rebellion, right?

Kath Elliott: 

Kath Elliott: It's ultimate rebellion because I think in Australia it's over 80% of adults drink alcohol. So I'm in the minority,…

Nick Poninski: 

Kath Elliott: right, of people who choose not to drink alcohol. And so I now see that that is actually at being ahead of the curve that's being kind rebellious. And so I've been able to reframe and turn that around. Yeah. which I think for a lot of people that can feel really good. What we are noticing is that younger generations are questioning the role that alcohol plays more than we did.

Nick Poninski: Love that.

Kath Elliott: They're they are experimenting with what is called sober curiosity which is not necessarily they're quitting drinking completely but they're drinking less.

Nick Poninski: Yeah.

Kath Elliott: They choose to go out and not drink at all. They may sometimes have one or two, but they are making more conscious and mindful decisions around the role that alcohol plays in their life. and I think that is actually where  It starts with us looking at this substance and really saying it's my responsibility in my life to look at it more closely to read some books to get some information about it and to work out what role do I want it to play. Are there aspects now in my life that I can change and how am I going to do that? Do I need support from someone else?

00:10:00

Kath Elliott: Can I do that on my own? am I prepared to experiment with it and see what it feels like? How differently I feel if I take a break from drinking for a month and then look at it and think, okay. My gosh, I feel so different." but you're getting up to that sort of 60day mark which is a really important sort of milestone because I often say that yes you can sort of break a habit in 21 to 30 days but really getting that habit more into your subconscious and autopilot can take 60 to 90 days and that's when you really start to feel

Kath Elliott: 

Kath Elliott: more freedom around,…

Kath Elliott: breaking a habit.

Nick Poninski: No, I love that.

Nick Poninski: I think that's very true as well. I read atomic habits and whatnot. I mean, talks about all those ways that you build a habit and break a habit and, those are really interesting ideas. I love the fact that you talk about 30 days, 60 days, etc. Cuz we are obviously just before Christmas is going to be absolutely everywhere for the next two weeks or so. But then there's sober January coming up. So, there'll be a lot of people experimenting with giving up alcohol for that month. And I wonder if there's some advice that you can share with people that maybe want to reduce their drinking around the festive period. Maybe they want to give up for January and then maybe they want to explore it a little bit,…

Kath Elliott: 

Nick Poninski: further on and just say, "Listen, let's see how it goes. I've done January and then I'm just going to see how it goes."  So yeah.

Kath Elliott: Yeah. Yeah.

Kath Elliott: It's a great time of year to be having this conversation because often people go into that sort of festive holiday period without a plan around drinking and they end up feeling terrible like drunk way more than they wanted to. things have got out of control. and particularly at work and office parties, this can be a real danger. and I guess a couple of my recommendations would be that if you want to drink less, if you want to feel better, if you want to look after your health, you have to consciously kind of make a bit of a plan before you go into any of these events.

Kath Elliott: and think to yourself, what parameters do I want to set for myself? I want to drive? Do I want to just have one or two drinks? do I want to just stick to drinking, beer wine rather than mixing drinks, because that can be a real danger. in terms of motivating yourself for something like sober January or dry January it's really important to find I guess a motivation that feels real and true for you so you need to connect with a positive emotional why for you so that could be that you want to sleep better or that you want to connect with

Kath Elliott: another health goal as well. You want to get up and go to the gym in the mornings, And so obviously if you feel better the next day by not drinking the night before, that can go hand in hand. You can recruit, a friend or family member to join you in your decision as well. And that can be really fun and really to look at it as an experiment and an opportunity. you don't have to think about it as forever.  It's like, hey, I'm giving my body and brain a rest from this toxic substance. of course, I'm going to be gaining things. it's about thinking about, okay, if I'm normally drinking at 5:00 in the afternoon after work, why don't I instead look at another activity that I can do at that point in time?

Kath Elliott: 

Kath Elliott: whether that's going for a walk, doing some exercise, whether or not it's starting to look at some non-alcoholic drinks that you can prepare for yourself. listening, there's so many.

Nick Poninski: There's loads of them these days.

Nick Poninski: I went to the pub the other day. they've got non-alcoholic beer, non-alcoholic Guinness. It's all there.

Kath Elliott: Yeah, There's a lot of non-alcoholic drink options. and that can be a really great support for people initially. for some people going to those options can be a little bit triggering for the real thing, but for others it's absolutely a massive help.

00:15:00

Kath Elliott: 

Kath Elliott: And I think, when you think about having a break away from drinking for a month, if that feels really hard and…

Nick Poninski: Yes.

Kath Elliott: really difficult, it's about sort of biting it off into small chunks, It's really about a day at a time. And, the thing is, if you do decide to drink in that time, don't give yourself, a massive kind of hard time. You can always reset. There's often something to learn if you do drink, if you have made a commitment not to drink, because There'll be some sort of environmental trigger. and you can kind of look at that and think, what changes could I make? What have I learned from that?

Kath Elliott: and how do I move forward rather than thinking, no, I've had a drink that I can just let go and blow out again. so I think the whole mindset around changing your relationship with alcohol is much more around just being open to new information, new knowledge, and taking action in life that disrupts the patterns that you've created probably over years and years and years. And it takes time to unwind those patterns.

Nick Poninski: Yeah, 100%. Right. These are your behaviors.

Kath Elliott: 

Nick Poninski: It's normal. So, changing what is normal is always difficult, I mean my audience are professionals so they know all about change programs.

Kath Elliott: Yeah, it takes Yes.

Nick Poninski: They know all about the difficulties there.

Kath Elliott: Exactly. They know all about change programs. And again it's about the neural pathways in our brain. We have these habitual alcohol pathways habits that have developed over years and…

Kath Elliott: it takes time to wind them back right and as human beings we don't want to change we don't like changing it's uncomfortable we get feelings of fear we want to stay in the familiar even if it is causing negative consequences

Nick Poninski: No. Yeah. Yeah.

Kath Elliott: So being aware of that is important too. You got to lean into the discomfort and the fear knowing that on the other side, we don't know what to expect sometimes. But what I will say is if you drink less, take a break from drinking, you will eventually find some really positive side effects and gains in your life.

Nick Poninski: everyone's questions, but I'm guessing that big you go to the pub with a friend and they say, "What do you mean you're not drinking?" that is going to be a big one for people, How do they explain to people that they're no longer drink, they're not having a drink this time, they're no longer drinking. how do you handle that one?

Kath Elliott: 

Nick Poninski: That's a big one, we don't want to miss out on the tribe,…

Kath Elliott: Yeah, it is a big one and…

Kath Elliott: it's actually one that most of my clients Yeah.

Nick Poninski: because if we lose that tribe, it goes back to that not wanting to lose things like you say that mindset that we have. We don't want to change because change is scary. We're fear of the unknown. We also don't want to get kicked out of the tribe. We don't want our friends to think badly of us. So, yeah,…

Kath Elliott: Yeah. Absolutely.

Nick Poninski: how do we handle that?

Kath Elliott: It's a big fear. How you handle that is again it's about preparing and a plan about how you communicate to people in your life. And you have different groups of people in your life.

Kath Elliott: 

Kath Elliott: the biggest benefit in how you communicate is actually positive language around why you've chosen to have a break rather than being on the back foot and saying h I'm having a break and it's really hard or I'm not drinking at the moment because that…

Kath Elliott: if you communicate in that way people see a weakness and they'll go don't be ridiculous have a drink don't be Exactly.

Nick Poninski: Don't be boring.

Nick Poninski: Don't be soft.

Kath Elliott: Whereas if you get on the front foot with simple clear messaging and say something along the lines of I was struggling with really really bad sleep patterns and I've decided to have a break and I'm feeling much better so I'm not drinking at the moment.

00:20:00

Kath Elliott: people don't argue. They go, " that's great." but even if they do, it's still you being and owning your change, right? It's you not getting on the back foot and feeling like you need to people please. Because at the end of the day, we're always going to have people in our lives who go, "H, that's boring." Or, " you're not fun anymore."  that's actually a reflection on their own relationship with alcohol and not yours. So, it's really about cleaning up. Okay, how do I want to present? What's important to me? Do I need to communicate with some mates beforehand that I'm not drinking? often I've had clients who been really nervous about catching up with their, mates for a big weekend, right?

Kath Elliott: 

Kath Elliott: and they're not drinking. And I'm like, tell them beforehand because you don't want to get to the weekend and people are shoving beers in your hand and you're going, " hang on." it's about being honest about who you are and what you're doing. and look, you don't have to go into all the, aspects of your story, but it's just about owning it and saying, "Hey guys, I'm doing really well and I've taken a break and I'm feeling the best I've felt in a long time and this is what I'm doing." …

Kath Elliott: and I think when they know that you're positive, when they know that you're feeling good about it, they might have a bit of a joke about it initially, but they move on pretty quickly.

Nick Poninski: Yeah. Yeah.

Nick Poninski: I like that being on the positive front foot. and saying why you're not drinking and having that plan in mind. I was about to say you could just say that you just don't like Not enjoying it anymore. but yeah, it's Yeah.

Kath Elliott: 

Kath Elliott: Or you could just say, " didn't you know it's a poison?" And then everyone like, "I'm not going to hang out with you anymore." It's so true.

Nick Poninski: I think that is the worry of people.  They are worried that people will turn around and say, "I'm not going to hang out with you anymore." And The reality is, if somebody says that to you, bloody hell, they're not really a friend, are they? No real friend of yours would ever say that.

Kath Elliott: And look, you may lose a few friendships along the way, but those aren't real friendships as you say. and look, what I found in my life is that I have gained so many more authentic,…

Nick Poninski: 

Kath Elliott: genuine connections and friendships and deepened friendships in my life since I have embraced this lifestyle.

Kath Elliott: 

Kath Elliott: So any fear that I had, I now look back and say my relationships are a lot richer now than they were when I was drinking. And I still have a lot of fun, right? I have access to more fun now as a non-drinker than I did when I was a drinker.

Nick Poninski: Yeah. Yeah.

Nick Poninski: Yeah. I wouldn't disagree with you.

Nick Poninski: I went to my hockey team reunion two months ago or so and I didn't drink all night and I had a great time. Loved it. Wanted to go to bed by about 11 p.m. which probably wouldn't have been happening if I was binge drinking my night away. But hey ho. Woke up the next day. No hang up.

Kath Elliott: Yeah. Yeah.

Kath Elliott: I mean, this is the thing.

Nick Poninski: Yes.

Kath Elliott: you don't waste time drinking and overstaying and I agree with you for me I used to be the last person at a party or an event and now it's time to go home at 11 or midnight you've had four or five hours of conversation you've done what you need to do and they often say nothing good happens after midnight and really what the people who are out after midnight are generally  the people who are drinking too much, and nothing really interesting is happening then. It's just repetitive conversation. and yeah, I always feel really good now when I leave early. it's great.

Kath Elliott: 

Nick Poninski: to give people that they can go away with.  What have you got for us?

Kath Elliott: Yeah. …

Kath Elliott: I think a takeaway here is that if you're thinking about taking a break or drinking less, it's really to plan beforehand. it's really important to think about how you're going to approach social events.

00:25:00

Kath Elliott: and one of the, I guess, most important things you can do is have someone in your corner who you can share the experience with, that you can trust and who will help support you as you make changes, whether it's drinking less or taking a break.

Nick Poninski: Love And I mean we gave you a shout out last week.

Kath Elliott: 

Nick Poninski: It was a great website. Perfect. So where does someone go to find out more about you, Fantastic.

Kath Elliott: Yeah, sure.

Kath Elliott: My website is the alcohol mindsetcoach.com and I also have an Instagram account at the alcohol mindset coach.

Nick Poninski: Thank you for ing been a pleasure hearing about some good tactics about how to give up alcohol and how to change your relationship with it. So yeah, thank you for joining us.

Kath Elliott: Thanks for having me, Nick. Really appreciate it.

Nick Poninski: Yeah, my pleasure. And for those of you listening along at home, hopefully that was helpful and hopefully it's given you some ideas about adjusting your relationship with alcohol or even considering to give up in either way, as ever, get marketing because without marketing there's no sales and without sales there's no business. So, get marketing.